The Kid (He Swears a Bit) Chords

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First time he'd ever had shoes on, [G] very first day at school, [D] and the sweet young teacher straight from [A] college, her first day there too.
[D] His mum and Miss Brown chatted about [G] living out there in the scrub, and [D] how he'd grown up with the shearers, and how [A] he'd done it [D] pretty rough.
_ But [G] he could cull and crutch and dip and [D] dag, though he was only six.
[E] But I think it's best to warn, as [A] she said, he swears a little bit.
I'll [D] keep me eye on him, Miss Brown promised.
[G] He can be my helping hand.
And I'm [D] sure we'll be the best of friends, now [A] won't we, little man?
[D] He didn't even raise his eyes, [G] he just bit his bottom lip and [D] shuffled sand with his new shoes and [A] said,
I [D] don't give a shit. _
[G] Now, now, she said, if you don't [D] swear I'll let you ring the bell, he said.
[E] You're supposed to be the [A] fucking gun, go ring the cunt [D] yourself, and tell me what time's fucking smoke-o?
What [G] time do we knock off?
And [D] I'm busting for a fucking shit, so [A] where's the thunderbox?
And do [D] we get our daily roly-weed and [G] six cold cans of piss?
[D] And can any bastard tell me [A] whose fucking [D] show is this? _ _ _ _ _ _
_ _ _ _ But that didn't seem to faze her, she [G] just knelt down next to him and [D] sweetly smiled and softly whispered,
[A] We'd better start again, because you [D] must learn not to swear like that, [G] because it's against the rules, he said.
[D] Well, stick your rules and stick your shoes [A] and stick your [D] fucking school.
But [G] she just grit her teeth and forced a [D] smile and didn't let it show, she [E] just said,
Let's both go on the veranda [A] and we'll have another go.
Now, if you [D] stand here beside me, you can help [G] me call the children up.
He [D] said, you don't need me to help you, what you [A] need's a fucking mutt.
[D] But again it just bounced off her [G] and she let his comment pass.
[D] Had it been me, I would have kicked [A] that midget mongrel up [D] the ass.
But she [G] said, now listen carefully [D] boys and girls and please don't make a sound.
[E] You fucking tell them lady, [A] can't you bastards get [D] around and find out what time's fucking smoke-o?
What [G] time do we knock off?
And [D] if you're busting for a fucking shit, where [A] to find the thunderbox?
And do we get [D] our daily roly-weed and six [G] cold cans of piss?
[D] And can any bastard tell me whose [A] fucking [D] show is this? _ _
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The kid had turned that school right on its [G] ear and come recess time,
two [D] teachers had fucking heart attacks and [A] another six resigned.
But through [D] the barrage in the bedlam, [G] Miss Brown just kept it cool and [D] just ignored that little asshole [A] who was trying to [D] wreck the school.
The [G] head said, just hide here in the [D] staff room until things settle down.
[E] It's really quite a lovely school, [A] you'll get to like it here Miss Brown.
[D] But back outside there in the school yard, things [G] were getting pretty hot.
The little [D] cunt had formed a union and signed [A] all the other mongrels up.
[D] Because he'd learned proper from the shearers and [G] remembered what they taught.
He [D] promised one day on and three days [A] off and if it rained, don't come at [D] all.
But [G] meanwhile, back there in the building, [D] the staff were shitting broken glass.
[E] As the little sawn-off savages [A] started chanting their [Bm] demands, they [D] said,
Oi, what time's fucking smoke-o?
What [G] time do we knock off?
And if [D] we're busting for a fucking shit, [A] where's the thunderbox?
And do we get [D] our daily roly-weed [G] and six cold cans of piss?
[D] And can any bastard tell us, [A] whose fucking show [D] is this? _ _ _ _ _
_ _ _ The shit-scared head just shook and trembled as he [G] sobbed,
Stick with me, staff!
[D] As one by one those left behind [A] up and bolted for their cars.
[D] And they knew the head had gone tatars [G] and his spring had finally sprung,
[D] When he pissed and shit his dacks and started [A] screaming for his [D] mum. _ _
[G] Then Miss Brown volunteered [D] and said,
I know I'm only new, [E] but I spent my life around shearing [A] sheds,
I'll see what I can do, because my [D] brothers are all shearers,
And [G] I was once their roustabout,
[D] So I'll go out there if you like and [A] try and sort the problem out.
[D] She ducked and weaved and sidestepped as she [G] walked across the yard,
And [D] straight up to the little cunt, drinking [A] rum and [D] playing cards.
_ And when [G] she decked him with a [D] 4b2, the whole school stopped and gawked,
And [E] she said, listen here you [Bm] little cunt, [A] we need to fucking [D] talk,
Because there ain't no fucking smoke out, [G] I'll say when we knock off,
And [D] I'll tell you when to fucking shit too, [A] because I'm the fucking boss,
[D] And forget your fucking Rollywood, [G] you'll get fuck all here for free,
And if you [D] want to know who runs this show,
YOU!
ME! _
_ _ _ Can't get around you little cunt, get in line!
Right up the inside, go on! _
_ _ You'd sit right up the fucking front row, I'd keep my fucking eye on you! _ _ _
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_ This is not too bad, _ I can see right up her dress from here. _ _ _ _
_ Jesus!
_ There's a bear in there, _ _ _ and a chair as well,
_ And _ _ a horse and cart,
_ _ _ _ _ And the Leyland Brothers! _ _ _ _
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