Chords for Kevin Bloody Wilson - Absolute Cunt Of A Day (Lyrics)

[D] _ _ _ [E] _ _ _ _ _
_ _ _ _ I've had an [B] absolute [E] cunt of a day.
[A] Everything that [E] could go did go [A] wrong.
So if I'm allowed to [E] use the word cunt in a song,
I've had an [Bm] absolute cunt [E] of a day. _ _
Started as a fart in bed.
[A] Well, it started as a [E] fart, but I shit myself [A] instead
and the fucking missus [E] going off her fucking head.
[Gb] I've had an absolute cunt [B] of a [E] day.
And running to the dunny like a bastard.
[A] Trying to hold it in [E] with me finger up me [A] arse
and skidding past the [E] kids and them little cunts laughing.
I've had an [B] absolute [E] cunt of a day.
_ I've had an absolute cunt of a day.
[A] Everything that [E] could go did go [A] wrong.
So if I'm allowed to [E] use the word cunt in a song,
I've had an absolute cunt of a day.
[C] _ _ _
[F] No hot [C] water, had to [F] take a cold shower.
[Bb] Scrubbing shit from every [F] orifice took a fucking [Bb] hour.
Then fuck, fuck, [F] fuck, no fucking towels.
[G] I've had an absolute [C] cunt of a day. _
[F] [C] Pulling on me [F] jeans and tripped.
[Bb] Broke me fucking [F] nose and split me fucking lip.
[Bb] Got me cock caught [F] in me fucking zip.
I've had an absolute cunt of a day.
Tell me.
[C] I've had [F] an [C] absolute [F] cunt of a day.
[Bb] Everything that [F] could go did go [Bb] wrong.
So if I'm allowed to [F] use the word cunt in a song,
I've had an [C] absolute [F] cunt of a day.
[D] _ _ _
[G] Then driving me self to the doctors.
[C] Busted and [G] bleeding, cock swollen and [C] throbbing.
Not a good [G] time to get stopped by the [A] cops.
I've had an absolute [D] cunt of a day.
[G] [D] Bastard didn't [G] even let me explain.
[C] Just cuffed me [G] up and hauled me off to [C] jail.
No fucking [G] phone call, no fucking bail.
I've had [D] an absolute [Gm] cunt of a [G] day.
Your turn.
[C] I've [G] had an [D] absolute [G] cunt of a day.
[C] Everything [G] that could go did go [C] wrong.
So if I'm allowed [G] to use the word cunt in a song,
I've had [D] an absolute [G] cunt of a day.
[E] _ _ _
[A] So, your [E] honour, [A] that's how it is.
[D] That's exactly how it [A] started and how it ended all up [D] here.
And you fucking lot [A] laughing ain't making it too [B] easy.
I've had an absolute [E] cunt of a day.
[A] And I'm in [E] too much fucking [A] pain to bleed.
[D] And I don't give a [A] fuck if you don't believe [D] me.
Just take me out the back and [A] fucking shoot me, please.
I've had an [E] absolute cunt of [A] a day.
_ _ I've had an [E] absolute [A] cunt of a day.
_ [D] Everything that could [A] go did go wrong.
[D] So if I'm allowed to [A] use the word cunt in a song,
I've had an [E] absolute [A] cunt of a day.
_ _ [Gbm] [A] I've had an [E] absolute cunt [A] of a,
[E] just another [A] one of them absolute [Em] cunt [A] of a days.
[A] _
Nashville, thank you very much.
It's great to be with you.
[Am] _ _ _