Chords for Orphan Tears (The Full Trilogy)

[D] _ _ _ _ [C] _ _ _ _
[A] _ _ _ _ [Bb] _ _ [G] _ _
[D] It was a weekend, and you [C] can't stop us from going to the local [Am] dance spot.
Instead of drinking imported [Bb] beer, somebody brought a [G] bottle of Orphan [D] Tears.
We popped the top, we knew it was in [C] it.
Yeah, we were all so stupid to sip [A] it.
Orphan Tears are so hallucinogenic, [G] I took one drink and saw a two-headed [D] midget.
And the room filled with colors and [C] shapes, and suddenly DJ was covered in [A] snakes.
Oh, snap!
And what made it worse [Gm] was I swear I saw a unicorn [D] humping a smurf,
then a rainbow appeared out of Wax's [C] ass.
He passed some gas and it snapped in [A] half.
Yo, DJ, are you still there?
[Bb] Yeah, I'm trying to hook [G] up with this girl in a [D] wheelchair.
Alright, chill there.
I think I believe [C] Nick Care Bear might pick a fight with [A] Jesus.
I don't believe it.
I'm gonna be seasick.
[G] These Orphan Tears are about to make me [D] trip.
Little children, care and [C] fart on the way your parents [A] are.
Cry directly in the [Bb] star.
I will [G] drink it at the [D] bar.
Ha!
_ _ [C] _ _ _ _
[A] _ _ _ _ [Bb] _ _ [G] _ _
_ _ _ _ [Am] _ _ _ _
[A] _ _ _ _ [Bb] _ _ [G] _ _
[D] These Orphan Tears got [C] me feeling like I ain't felt before.
[A] I tried to bust a move, [Bb] but fell asleep on the [N] dance floor.
_ _ _ _ _ _ Dude, get up!
[D] I swear I saw Bill [C] Cosby like,
Hello, it's the [A] pudding!
He was dancing in his [G] underwear, showing off his [D] booty.
I ran to the bathroom.
[C] _ Everything's in slo [A]-mo.
I couldn't throw up [Bb] cause the toilet [G] bowl called me a [D] homo.
I'm part of a kid and [C] I'm feeling strange.
[A] Sipping these Orphan Tears, [G] now it's got me seeing [D] things.
Little children, care and [C] fart on the way your parents [A] are.
Cry directly in the [Bb] star.
I will [Gm] drink it at the bar.
[D] Ha!
I _ [C] _ _ _ _
[A] _ _ _ _ [Bb] _ _ [G] _
[D] was in the VIP section, straight [C] relaxed.
DJ playing my favorite [A] tracks.
Waitress asked, what can I [Gm] bring you?
I said, the most expensive thing on the [D] menu.
She came back with a glass of [C] liquid.
I said, I asked for something [A] different.
This looks like a normal [Gm] beer.
She said, nods, Orphan [Bm] Tears.
Took a swig, then I walked down [C] with the dance floor.
His whole club looking like a [Am] forest.
DJ turned to a brontosaurus.
[G] Everybody in the club looked like Chuck [D] Norris.
I tried to run to the bathroom, [C] but when I did,
I felt a vacuum [A] suction pulling me back [Bb] slow.
Dance floor [G] turned to a black [D] hole,
spinning around horribly, [C] feeling like Dorothy.
[A] Woke up, I'm still at home.
[G] Orphan Tears got us [D] in the zone.
Little children, care and [C] fart on the way your parents [A] are.
Cry directly in the [Bb] star.
I will [G] drink it at the [D] bar.
Ha!
_ _ [C] _ _ _ _
[A] _ _ _ _ [Bb] _ _ [G] _ _
[D] Little children, care and [C] fart on the way your parents [A] are.
Cry directly in the [Bb] star.
I will [G] drink it at the [D] bar.
Ha!
_ _ [C] _ _ _ _
[A] _ _ _ _ [Gm] _ _ _ [G] _
[D] _ _ _ _ [C] _ _ _ _
[A] _ _ _ _ [Bb] _ _ [G] _ _
[D] _ _ _ [C] Pudding, pud-pud-pud [A]-pudding.
_ Hello, it's [G] pudding, pudding, pudding. _
[D] Pudding, _ _ [C] pudding, pudding. _
[A] _ _ _ [G] And _ _ [D] we're back.
Back to the disco, [C] back to the music, back to the flashing [A] lights.
Went straight to the bar like,
hey, [G] let me get a round of Orphan Tears on ice.
[D] I only took one sip and it's kicking in.
[C] I said, hey, wax, can you help me?
[A] It's kind of funny everybody calls you [G] wax,
because everything is wax [Bm] on you.
My left hand turned to Scooby Doo.
[C] I got chased around by a Gucci shoe.
[A] I heard an explosion behind me.
I [Bb] didn't look back like the [G] people in the movies do.
[Dm] I saw a gang of tiny [C] human.
I prayed to Morgan [A] Freeman.
It's snowing, now I'm [Bb] glowing.
Orphan Tears, [D] man, I must be dreaming.
Little children, care [C] and fart [A] on the way your parents [Bb] _ [G] are. _
[D] Cry directly in the [C] star. _
[A] I will drink it at the [Gm] _ _ _ _
_ [Gb] _ _ _ _ _ _ [Em] _
[Dbm] _ _ _ _ [D] _ _ _ _
[Em] _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
[A] _ _ _ _ [E] _ _ _
bar.
One shot, two shot, three [N] shot, four of them.
Into my body go the tears of an orphan.
[Bb] My brain releases endorphins.
Look around [G] and everything started [D] morphing.
What I thought was a cocktail waitress
became a yellow [A] hard work with braces.
We followed her to a faraway [Bb] place
in which it was dark [G] and it was dozens of [D] pages.
Little cartoon pigs [C] inside them.
I was laughing, taking pictures [A] by them.
Looked closer, the pigs were [Bb] crying.
What in God's [G] name is this [A] signifying?
In a daze, all of us were lost.
Hours passed and the drugs wore off.
Wait, we're in a warehouse [Bb] building.
Those aren't [G] pigs.
Those are actually [D] little children.
Little children, [C] care and fart _
[Am] on the way your parents [Bb] _ [G] are. _
[D] Cry directly in the [C] star. _
[Am] I will drink it at the [Bb] _ _ _ _
[D] _ _ _ _ [C] _ _ _ _
[A] _ _ _ _ [Bb] _ _ _ [Dm] _
_ _ [D] _ _ [C] _ _ _ _
_ [A] _ _ _ [Bb] _ _ [Gm] _
[Dm] bar.
We found a bunch [C] of kids working in a [Am] sweatshop
and they would cry into [Bb] mason jars [Gm] and bottle [Dm] it up.
We got to help [C] them out of here.
I'm not an engineer, [Am] but I think these [Bb] orphan tears
are made [Gm] from actual orphan's [D] tears.
Suddenly, Bill [Am] Cosby appeared in the doorway right behind me. Hello!
[A] He was tampi tall and a [Bb] top hat ready to fight [G] me
in his whitey [D]-pidey.
He's pretty sure Bill's in charge of the place
[C] because he's swolled up, looking like a grizzly bear.
[A] That bloodsucker looked us dead in the face.
[Ab] These children aren't going anywhere.
Rawr!
Sip, sip, and [C] I'm, sip, sip, and [A] I'm, sip, sip, and [Gm] I'm [G] a pinchy.
[D] The story continues real [E] oddly.
I'm staring at Bill [F] Cosby,
thinking that we'll [E] probably have to attempt to kill [Dm] Cosby.
I was scared and my legs were [C] wobbling,
but I knew that we had to stop [Dm] him.
I could hear the orphans [G] sobbing.
My morals made me [Dm] confident.
I screamed out, get him, y'all,
[Ab] and the place turned into a frickin' brawl.
[A] A lot of kung fu punches and kicks involved,
[Bb] through the legs, through the body, [G] through the lips and jaw.
[Dm] It was a really good fight we were putting up,
[G] but Bill Cosby just wouldn't [A] budge.
He kept eating them pudding cups.
[Bb] It was hard to beat [G] him.
He was super tough.
[Dm] Punch after punch, he just kept on [C] clocking me.
While he was doing it, he was doing [A] comedy.
It was pretty funny, [Bb] honestly, I hate to admit.
[G] Then I snapped out of it [D] when he used his sweater
as a makeshift [C] whip.
Hit me in the legs and he made me trip, [A] man.
We were getting our asses [Bb] kicked,
and that wasn't [G] even the last of [D] it.
Cosby snapped his fingers [C] and he screamed out, _
[Am] Soon we were surrounded by [Bb] some, you [G] guessed it,
robot.
[Dm] But these weren't normal robots that [C] we saw standing before us.
[Dm] They were all pure evil, [G] and they
looked just like Chuck Norris.
Get [D] him.
Little children near and [C] far don't
know where your parents [Am] are.
Cry directly in this [Bb] jar, I will [G] drink it at the bar.
Little [D] children near and [C] far don't
know where your parents [A] are.
Cry directly [B] in this jar, I will [E] drink it [Dm] at the bar.
Slip, slip in [C] line.
Slip, slip in [Am] line.
Slip, slip in [Bb] on our [Gm] pinkies. _
[Dm] _ Slip, slip in [C] line.
[F] Slip, slip in [Am] line.
Slip, slip in [Bb] on our _ [Gm] pinkies.
[D] I got a lot of robot chucks all around me,
and I'm sitting there getting my ass kicked.
Then I thought about what Bill Cosby said,
and a flashback of our last trip.
He said, hello, it's the [A] pudding.
Hey, the pudding cup's [Dbm] maybe key.
That's what gives him super strength.
What if [D] it does the same to me?
So I looked around till I found some.
[C] Then I grabbed a cup and I downed some.
[A] And I thought to myself, man, how dumb
[Bb] till I grew the size [G] of a mountain.
[D] And I got buff and changed a bunch.
Now all tough and dangerous.
[A] So I turned to the whole gang of chucks and said,
yo, Texas [D] Rangers suck.
I was just distracting them [C] while my friends hulk out too.
[A] Smash.
Pretty soon thereafter, we [Bb] were tearing
through those ground [Dm] troops.
And circuits were flying, [C] and robots getting laid out.
[Am] I hit one so hard he runs [Bb] on Windows 98 now.
[D] Since we're so friggin' [C] large, Cosby ran, but we hit him [A] hard.
Probably tell you it [Bb] hurts, cause we beat him up
like a rental [Dm] car.
We set the children [C] free, free from the predator.
[Am] Before we [D] left, we took the cash out the register.
Little children near and [C] far don't
know where your parents [Am] are.
Cry directly in this [Bb] jar, I will [G] drink it before.
[D] Little children near and [C] far don't
know where your parents [Am] are.
Cry directly in this [Bb] jar, I will [G] _ _
[Dm] drink it before.
Sip, sip in [C] mine.
Sip, sip in [Am] mine.
Sip, sip it [Bb] on our [Gm] vintage. _
[Dm] _ Sip, sip in mine.
Sip, [F] sip in [Am] mine.
Down our [Bb] warped [D] vintage. _
_ _ _ _ _ [F] My grandmama used to tell me one day [Fm] I would be king.
And [F] that it could be me to