Lobachevsky Chords by Tom Lehrer

For many years now, Mr.
Danny Kay, who has been my particular idol since childbirth, has been doing a routine _ _ _ _
a routine about the great Russian director Stanislavski and the secret of success in the acting profession.
And I thought it would be interesting to adapt this idea to the _ _ _ field of mathematics.
I always like to make explicit the fact that before I went off not too long ago to fight in the trenches,
I was a mathematician by profession.
I don't like people to get the idea that I have to do this for a living.
_ _ I mean, it isn't as though I had to do this, you know.
I could be making, oh, $3,000 a year just teaching. _ _
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
_ Be that as it may, some of you may have had occasion to run into mathematicians and to wonder, therefore, how they got that way. _ _ _ _
_ Here, in partial explanation, perhaps, is the story of the great Russian mathematician Nikolai Ivanovich Lobachevsky.
_ _ [Dm] _
_ [E] _ _ [Am] _ Who made me the genius I am today?
The mathematician that others all quote.
Who's the professor that made me that way?
The greatest that ever got chalk on his coat.
Who [Am] on mine deserves the credit?
Who on mine deserves the blame?
Nikolai [E] Ivanovich Lobachevsky is [Am] his name.
Nikolai Ivanovich [E] Lobachevsky is his name.
I never forget the day I first met the great Lobachevsky.
In one word, he told me the secret of success in mathematics. _ _
_ _ [Am] Plagiarize.
Plagiarize.
Let no one [Dm] else's work evade your eyes.
Remember why the good [E] Lord made your eyes.
[Am] So don't shade your eyes, but [E] plagiarize, [A] plagiarize, plagiarize.
Only be sure to call it, please, research.
_ [E] _ [Am] And ever since I met this man, my life is not the same.
Nikolai [E] Ivanovich Lobachevsky [Am] is his name.
Nikolai [E] Ivanovich Lobachevsky is his name.
I never forget the [N] day I am given the first original paper to write.
_ It was on analytic and algebraic topology of locally Euclidean metrization of infinitely differentiable Riemannian manifold.
_ _ _ _ This, _ from nothing.
But I think of great [A] Lobachevsky and [B] I get idea.
[G] I [C] have a [G] friend in Minsk who has a friend [C] in Pinsk, whose [G] friend in Omsk has friend in Tomsk with friend in Akhmolinsk.
[G] His friend in Aleksandrovsk [C] has friend in Petropavlovsk, [G] whose friend somehow is solving now the problem [C] in Dnepropetrovsk.
And when his [G] work is done, begins the fun.
From Dnepropetrovsk to Petropavlovsk, by way of Ilyich Novorossiysk, to Aleksandrovsk, to Akhmolinsk, to Tomsk, to Omsk, to Pinsk, [D] to Minsk.
To me, the [G] news will run.
[D] Yes, to me, the news [G] will run.
_ _ And then I write by morning and [C] night and afternoon.
And pretty [G] soon my name in Dnepropetrovsk is cursed.
[C] When he finds out, I publish [E] first.
And [Am] who made me a big success and brought me wealth and fame?
Nikolai [E] Ivanovich Lobachevsky is [Am] his name.
Nikolai Ivanovich [E] Lobachevsky is his name.
I never [F#] forget the day my first book is published.
Every chapter I stole from somewhere else.
_ _ Index I copied from old Vladivostok telephone directory.
_ _ [F] _ This book was sensational.
Правда, правда, правда, жил бил, когда [N] при нем блоха жила.
It stings. _ _ _ _ _
_ Известия, седь, я иду, куда санцарий идет пешком.
It stings.
_ _ Metro-Gold in Moscow.
_ The movie writes for six million rubles.
Changing title to The Eternal Triangle.
_ _ With Brigitte Bardot playing part of Tripartinus.
[E] _ [Am] And who deserves the credit?
And who deserves the blame?
Nikolai [E] Ivanovich Lobachevsky [Am] is his name.
_ _ [E] _ _ [Am] _ [N] _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _