The Real Slim Shady Chords by Eminem

[Cm] _ [Ab] _ _ _ May I have your attention please?
_ May I have your attention please? _
Will the real Slim Shady please stand up?
_ [G] I repeat, [Ab] will the real Slim Shady please [Eb] stand up?
We're gonna have a [Cm] problem here.
You act like you've never [Fm] seen a white person before, [Eb] jaws all on the floor [G] like Pam, like Tommy just burst in the door,
started [Ab] whooping her ass worse than before, they first got divorced, sewing her over furniture.
It's the return of the- aw, wait, no wait, you're kidding.
He didn't just say what I [G] think he did, [Cm] did he?
And Dr.
[Fm] Dre said, [G] nothing you idiot, it's Dr.
Dre's daddy.
It's locked in my [Cm] basement, [Gm] feminist [Ab] women love him and them.
Ticka ticka ticka Slim [G] Shady, I'm sick of him, [Ab] look at him, walking around, grabbing his you know [Eb] what, flipping it you know who.
Yeah, but he's so cute though.
Yeah, I probably got a [Fm] couple of screws up in my [Cm] head loose, but no worse than [G] what's going on in your parents' [Ab] bedrooms.
Sometimes I wanna get on TV and just let loose, but can't, but it's cool for Tom Green to hump a dead moose.
My bum is on your lips, my bum is on your [Eb] lips, and if I'm lucky you might just give [G] it a little [Ab] piss.
And that's the message that we deliver to little kids and expect them not to [Cm] know what a woman's is.
Of course they're gonna know what [Ab] intercourse is by the time they hit fourth grade.
They got the Discovery Channel, don't they?
We ain't nothing but mammals.
Well, some of us animals, but other people open like antelopes.
But if we can hump dead animals and antelopes, then there's no reason that a man and another man can't elope.
But if you feel like I feel, I got to [A] get a dope.
Women, wave your pantyhose, sing the chorus, [Cm] and it goes.
I'm Slim [Fm] Shady, yes I'm the real [Eb] Shady, all you other Slim [G] Shadys are just [Cm] demonstrating.
So, won't the real Slim [Fm] Shady please stand [Eb] up?
Please stand [G] up, please stand [Cm] up.
Cause I'm Slim [Fm] Shady, yes I'm the real [Eb] Shady, all you other Slim [G] Shadys are just [Cm] demonstrating.
So, won't the real Slim [Fm] Shady please stand [Eb] up?
Please stand [G] up, please stand [Cm] up.
Well, Slim don't got a [Fm] cluster of his raps to sell [Eb] records.
Well, I do.
[G] _
[Cm] You think I give a [Fm] damn about a Grammy?
[Cm] Half of you critics [Ab] can't even [G] stomach me, let alone [Eb] stand me.
But Slim, what if you [Fm] win?
Wouldn't it be weird?
[Eb] Why?
You guys just [G] lied to get me here [Cm] so you can sit me [Fm] here next to Britney Spears?
[Ab] Christina Aguilera better switch me chairs so I can sit next to Carson Daly and Fred Dirk.
And hear him argue over who she gave to first.
Little p----, put me on blast on MTV.
Yeah, he's cute, but I think he's married to Kim.
I should download her audio on MP3 and show the whole world how you gave Eminem.
I'm sick of you little girl and boy groups, all you do is annoy me.
So I have been sitting here to destroy you.
And there's a million of us just like me, who cuss like me, who don't give a p---- like me.
Who dress like me, walk, talk, and act like me.
And Jus might be the next [Cm] best thing, but not quite me.
Cuz I'm Slim Shady, [Fm] yes I'm the real Shady, [Eb] all you other Slim [G] Shadys are just in my [Cm] fantasy.
So won't the real Slim [Fm] Shady please stand up?
[Eb] Please stand up?
[G] Please stand up?
[Cm] Cuz I'm Slim Shady, [Fm] yes I'm the real Shady, [Eb] all you other Slim [G] Shadys are just in my fantasy.
[Cm] So won't the real Slim [Fm] Shady please stand up?
[Eb] Please stand up?
[G] Please stand up?
[Cm] I'm like a [Ab] hedgehog to listen to, cuz I'm only giving you things you joke about [G] with your friends.
Inside your living room, me only [F] different is I got the pause to say it in [Eb] front of y'all.
And I don't gotta be false or sugar [Ab]-coated at all
I just get on the mic and spit it
And whether you like to admit [G] it
I just [Eb] better than 90% of you [Ab] rappers outkid
Then [Eb] you wonder how can kids eat [Cm] up these albums like
This is funny
Set the rate I'm going when I'm 30
I'll be the only [G] person in the nursing home [Cm] flirty
Pinch the nurses [Fm] asses when I'm
But [Ab] jerkins and I'm jerking
But this whole back of a hacker isn't working
And every single person is a slim [F] shady lurking
[Eb] He could be working at Burger King
Spitting [Cm] on your onion rings
Or in the parking lot circling
Screaming I don't give a
With his windows down and his system up
[Ab] So will the real shady please stand up
And put one of those fingers on each [G] hand up
And be proud [Ab] to be out of your mind
And out of [Cm] control
And one more time, loud as you can
How does it go?
I'm Slim Shady?
[Fm] Yes, I'm the real shady
[Eb] Or you other Slim Shadys [Dm] are just [Cm] imitating
So won't the real Slim [Fm] Shady please stand up
[Eb] Please stand up
[G] Please stand [Cm] up
Cause I'm Slim Shady
[Fm] Yes, I'm the real shady
[Eb] Or you other Slim Shadys [G] are just imitating
[Cm] So won't the real Slim [Fm] Shady please stand up
[Cm] Please stand up
Please stand up
Cause I'm Slim Shady
Yes, I'm the [Fm] real shady
[Eb] All you other Slim Shady's [Dm] are just simul-tating
[Cm] So won't the real Slim [Fm] Shady please stand up?
[Cm] Please stand up, [G] please stand up
[Cm] Cause I'm Slim Shady, [Fm] yes I'm the real Shady
[Eb] All you other Slim Shady's [Gm] are just simu-tating
[Cm] So won't the real Slim [Fm] Shady please stand up?
[Eb] Please stand up, please stand up
Haha, [Cm] _ [Gm] guess it's the Slim Shady in all of [Cm] us
_ _ [Ab] _ _ That's all fam
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