The Real Slim Shady-Eminem (Explicit) Chords

[Cm] _ _ [Fm] _ _ [Cm] May [Fm] I have your [Cm] attention please?
_ [Ab] May I have your attention please?
[C] Will the real Slim Shady please [Fm] stand up?
[G] _ [Ab] _ _
Will the real Slim [Db] Shady please [Cm] stand up?
We're gonna have a problem here.
Y'all act like you've never [Fm] seen a white person before.
[Eb] Jaws all on the floor [G] like Pam.
Like Tommy just burstin' a door.
Started [Ab] whoopin' her ass worse than before.
That purse was divorced, someone threw it over furniture.
It's the return of the-
Aw, wait, no wait, you're kidding.
He didn't just say what I [C] think he did, did he?
And Dr.
Dre said,
[Ab] Nothing, you idiots.
Dr.
Dre's dead.
He's locked in my basement.
Feminist women love [F] Eminem.
[Eb] Chica, chica, chica, Slim Shady.
I'm [G] sick of him.
Look at him, [F] walkin' around, rabbin' his you-know [B]-what.
Blippin' his you-know-who.
Yeah, but he's so cute, [Eb] though.
Yeah, I probably got a [Fm] couple of screws up in my [Cm] head loops.
But no worse than [G] what's goin' on in your parents' [Ab] bedrooms.
Sometimes [Fm] I wanna get on TV and just [Eb] let loose.
But can't, but it's cool for Tom Green to hump a dead moose.
My bum is on your [Fm] lips.
My bum is on your [Ab] lips.
And if I'm lucky, [G] you might just give it a little kiss.
And that's the message [Ab] that we deliver to little kids.
And expect them not to know what a woman's clitoris [Eb] is.
Of course they're gonna know what in a [Fm] chorus is.
By [Eb] the time they hit fourth grade, they got the Discovery Channel.
Don't they?
[Ab] We ain't nothin' but mammals.
Well, some of us cannibals who cut other people open like cantaloupes.
But if [Fm] we can hump dead animals and [Ab] antelopes,
then there's no reason that a man and another man can't elope.
But if you feel like I feel, I got the candidote.
Women, wave your pantyhose.
[Cm] Sing the chorus and it goes,
I'm Slim [Fm] Shady, yes, I'm the real [Eb] Shady.
All you other Slim [G] Shadys are just stimulating.
[Cm] So won't the real [Fm] Slim Shady please stand [Eb] up?
Please stand [G] up.
Please stand [Cm] up.
Cause I'm Slim [Fm] Shady, yes, I'm the real [Eb] Shady.
All you other Slim Shadys are [Dm] just stimulating.
[Cm] So won't the real [Fm] Slim Shady please stand [Eb] up?
Please stand up.
Please stand up.
Well, Smith don't got a [Fm] cuss in his rap to sell [Ab] records.
No, well I do.
So fuck [G] him and fuck [Eb] you too.
You think I give a [Fm] damn about a Grammy?
[Ab] Half of you critics can't even stomach you, [G] let alone [Eb] stand me.
But Slim, what if [Fm] you win?
Wouldn't it be weird?
[Eb] Why?
You guys can just lie [G] to get me here.
[Ab] So you can sit me here next to Britney [G] Spears.
You should clean the Agilera, better switch these [Ab] chairs.
So I can sit next to Carson Daly and Fred Durst.
And hear him argue over who she gave [G] head to [Cm] first.
Little bitch put me [Fm] on blast on MTV.
[Cm] Yeah, he's cute, but I think he's married to Kim.
Hee hee.
I should download her audio [Fm] on [Cm] MP3.
And show the whole world how you gave him an MPD.
I'm sick of you [Fm] little girl and boy groups.
[Cm] All you do is annoy me.
So I have been sitting here to destroy you.
And there's a [Fm] million of us just like [Eb] me.
Who cuss like me.
Who [Cm] don't give a fuck like me.
Who dress like me.
[Fm] Walk, talk, and act like [A] me.
And this might be the next best thing, but not [Cm] quite me.
I'm Slim [Fm] Shady, yes, I'm the real [Eb] Shady.
All you other Slim [Dm] Shadys are just [Cm] imitating.
So all the real [Fm] Slim Shady, please stand [Eb] up.
Please stand [G] up.
Please stand [Cm] up.
Cause I'm Slim [Fm] Shady, yes, I'm the real [Eb] Shady.
All you other Slim [G] Shadys are just [Cm] imitating.
So all the real [Fm] Slim Shady, please stand [Eb] up.
Please stand up.
[G] Please stand [Eb] up.
I'm like a hedge whip to [Fm] listen to.
Cause I'm only [Cm] giving you things you joke about with your friends.
It's not your living room, the only difference [Fm] is I got the balls.
To [Cm] say it in front of y'all.
And I don't gotta be false, or sugar coated at all.
[Fm] I just get on the mic and [Eb] spit it.
And whether [Ab] you like to admit it.
I just shit it better than 90% [Fm] of you rappers out kids.
[Ebm] Then you wonder how can [Cm] kids eat up these albums like Valiums.
It's funny, [Fm] at the rate I'm going when I'm [Cm] 30.
I'll be the only person in the nursing home flirty.
Pinch a [Fm] nurse's asses when I'm jacking off [Cm] a Jurgens.
And I'm jerking, but this whole back up of Agra isn't working.
And every single [Fm] person is a Slim Shady [Cm] lurking.
He could be working at Burger King, spitting on your onion rings.
Or in [F] the parking lot circling, [Eb] screaming I don't give a fuck.
With his windows [Cm] down and his system up.
So will the real Shady please [Eb] stand up.
Put one of those fingers on each hand up.
And be proud to [Fm] be out of your mind and out [Cm] of control.
And one more time, loud as you can, loud as it goes.
I'm Slim [Fm] Shady , yes I'm the real [Eb] Shady.
All you other Slim [G] Shady's are just [Cm] Imitating.
So won't the real [Fm] Slim Shady please [Eb] stand up.
Please stand up, [G] please stand [Cm] up.
Cause I'm Slim [Fm] Shady, yes I'm the real [Eb] Shady.
All you other Slim Shady's are [Dm] just [Cm] Imitating.
So won't the real [Fm] Slim Shady please stand up.
[Cm] Please stand up, please stand up.
I'm Slim Shady, yes [Fm] I'm the real [Eb] Shady.
All you other Slim [Dm] Shady's are just [Cm] Imitating.
So won't the real [Fm] Slim Shady please stand [Eb] up.
Please stand [G] up, please stand [Cm] up,
Cause I'm Slim [Fm] Shady, yes I'm the real [Eb] Shady,
All you other Slim Shadys are [Dm] just in my [Cm] fanny,
So won't the real Slim Shady [Fm] please [Eb] stand up,
Please stand up, please stand up,
[Cm] Haha
[G] This is Slim Shady and all of [Cm] _ us [Fm] Talking
_ [Eb] Let's all stand up
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[Cm] _ _ _ _ [D] _ _ _ _
[Cm] _ _ _ _ [Ab] _ _ [G] _ _
[Cm] _ _ _ _ [F] _ _ [G] _ _
[Cm] _ _ _ _ [Eb] _ [Ab] _ [N] _ _