Everyones A Little Bit Racist Chords by John Tartaglia, Stephanie Dabruzzo, Natalie Venetia Belcon, Jordan Gelber, Ann Harada

Hey Kate, can I ask you a question?
Sure.
Well, you know Trekkie Monster upstairs?
Uh-huh.
Well, he's Trekkie Monster and you're Kate Monster.
Right.
You're both monsters.
Yeah.
Are you two related?
What?
Princeton, I'm surprised at you.
I find that racist.
Well, I'm sorry.
I was just asking.
Well, it's a touchy subject.
No, no monsters are related.
What are you trying to say, huh?
That we all look the same to you?
No!
Huh?
Huh?
Huh?
Oh, not at all.
Oh, I'm sorry.
I guess that was a little racist.
I should say so.
You should be much more careful when you're talking about the sensitive subject of race.
Well, [Am] look who's talking.
[D] What do you [Am] mean?
What about that special [D] monster school you told me [Em] about?
What about it?
Well, [D] could someone like me go there?
[A] No, we don't want [D] people like you.
Ha ha [A] ha ha ha.
You [G] see?
You're a little [D] bit racist.
[Bm] Well, you're a little [F] bit too.
I guess we're both a little bit racist.
[Am] Admitting it is not [Ebm] an easy thing to do.
But I guess it's true.
[Eb] Between me and you, I [Bm] think everyone's a little [C] bit racist [Bm] sometimes.
[C] _ _ [D] Doesn't mean we go [Am] around committing [Bm] hate [E] crimes.
_ [G] Look around and you will find no one's really colorblind.
Maybe [Eb] it's a fact we [E] all should _ _ [A] face.
Everyone [D] makes judgments _ [Bm] based on race.
Now, not big judgments like who to hire or who to buy a newspaper from.
No.
No, just little judgments [C] like thinking that Mexican [D] busboys learn to speak goddamn English.
Right.
[Bm] Everyone's a little [Am] bit racist [Bm] today.
[A] _
[Bm] So everyone's a little [Am] bit racist.
[Bm] Okay.
_ [E] _ _
[C] Ethnic jokes might be uncouth, [Cm] but you'll laugh because they're based on truth.
[G] Don't take [Eb] them as personal [E] _ attacks. _
[Am] _ Everyone enjoys [D] them.
_ [Bm] So relax.
All right, [C] stop if you've heard this one.
Okay.
[Bm] All right, there's a plane going down.
There's only [D] one parachute.
And [A] there's a rabbi, a priest.
And a black [Eb] guy. Yeah.
What you talking about, Kate?
_ You were telling a black joke.
Well, sure, Gary, but lots of people tell black jokes.
I [Bb] don't.
Well, of course you don't.
You're black.
But I bet you tell Polack jokes, right?
Well, sure I do.
Those stupid Polacks.
[C] Now, don't you think that's a little racist? _
Well, damn, [F] I guess you're right.
[D] You're a little bit racist.
[Am] Well, you're a little [Eb] bit too.
[Gm] We're all a little bit racist.
You think that I would have to agree with you?
[Db] We're glad you do.
It's sad, but true.
[Am] Everyone's a [Bb] little bit racist.
[D] All right.
All right.
[Bb] All right. _
[C] Bigotry has [Gm] never been [Am] exclusively white.
[D] _ _
[F] If we [Bb] all could just [F] admit that we are racist a little [C] bit.
Even [Db] though we all know [D] that it's wrong. _ _
Maybe [Gm] it would help [C] us [Am] get along.
Oh, [Bb] Christ, do I feel good.
Now, there was a [Ab] fine, upstanding [Bbm] black man.
[B] Who?
Jesus [Bbm] Christ.
But, [Ab] Gary, Jesus was [Db] white.
No, Jesus was [B] black.
No, Jesus was white.
No, I'm [Ab] pretty sure Jesus was black.
Guys, guys, Jesus was Jewish.
_ [Bm] _ _ [E] _ _
Hey, guys, what are you laughing about?
[B] Racism.
_ [F] _ _
_ _ _ _ What's that mean?
Um, [Bb] recyclables.
_ Hey, don't laugh at her.
How many languages do you speak?
[E] Oh, come off it, Brian.
[Dbm] _ Everyone's a little [D] bit racist.
[Dbm] I'm not.
Oh, no, no.
[E] How many oriental wives [Dbm] have you got?
What?
[Gb] _ [D] Brian, buddy, where you [Db] been?
Your term [D] is Asian [A] American. _ _ _
[Gb] _ _ [Ab] _ _ [Bm] _ _ [B] _ _
_ _ [E] _ [Bm] I'm sorry, honey.
I love you.
[Gbm] I [E] love you.
But [B] you're racist, [E] too.
Yeah, [Bm] I know.
[Db] _ _ _ _ [Gb] _ _
_ _ [B] _ _ _ _ [E] _ _
_ Me, too.
Me, [F] too.
I can't even get it past [Bb] it.
_ _ [Cm] _ _ [Dm] _ _ _ [C] _
_ [Bb] _ _ _ [Cm] _ [Gm] _ _ _
[D] _ [G] _ _ _ [Cm] _ _ _ _
_ _ [D] _ _ [Ab] _ _ [Bb] _ _
[Gb] _ _ [Gm] _ _ [G] _ _ _ [Eb] _
_ _ _ _ _ [Bb] Living harmony.
[Cm] _ _ It's a little [Bb] bit racist. _ _ _