Chords for Connie Evingson - My Attorney Bernie

I know, I know that Dave's intentions were not malicious in any way.
It's all in good fun, so don't take it personally.
[N] _ _ _ _ _ _ _
_ [Bb] _ _ _ _ [Dm] _ _ _
_ [Gm] _ _ [E] _ _ _ _ _
_ [Gm] _ _ _ _ [D] _ _ _
[A] I'm impressed [D] with [A] my attorney.
_ [D] _
[A] I'm impressed with his [G] influence. _ _
He's got very big connections, [Bbm] so I follow his directions.
[Ab] Bernie knows his way around, [G] and so I always [E] do.
When Bernie [A] recommends, [Dm] _ [A] I am _ [D]
with [A] my attorney, Bernie.
[D] _ [A] I'm impressed [D] with the way [G] he rests his tortoise.
[C] He's got Mariner [G] seasoned boxes, [Bb] and an [Eb] office full of foxes.
[Ab] It's amazing [Db] all the different [G] things your average [C] guy might need a [Eb] lawyer for.
Bernie [G] tells me what to do.
[E] Bernie lays it on [Abm] my mind.
Bernie [Gm] says we sue, we [G] sue.
Bernie says we sign, we [Dm] sign.
_ _ [Gm] _ _ _
_ [Dm] _ _ [Cm] _ _ _ _ _
_ [D] _ _ _ [A] I'm in touch [D]
with my [A] attorney, Bernie.
[D] _ [A] In a clutch, [D] he can speed [G] right to the seat.
And [Gm] if I'm locked [Cm] up in the jail, with [Bbm] just one phone call [G] for my bail,
[Ab] he says to call his club [Db] collect, [G] or deal directly [C] with his answering [Eb] machine.
This song was written before Boys Know.
[G] When I [D] dine with [A] my attorney, _ [D] _
he buys wine [D] from the rare [Ab] imported rank.
_ [G] _
[Gm] That's cause Bernie [Cm] is a purist, [Bbm] not your [Eb] polyester tourist.
[Ab] Bernie waves the glass around [G] the Isle of Antiques, _ [C]
and always [G] sends it back.
_ [Eb] Bernie tells me what to do.
[E]
Bernie [A] lays it on my mind.
Bernie says we sue, we [G] sue.
Bernie says we sign, [A] we [Ab] sign.
[D] _
_ [Cm] _ _ _ _ _ _ [Gb] _
_ [G] _ _ [Em] _ _ [C] _ _ [Bb] _
_ [Db] _ _ [Cm] _ _ [C] _ _ [G] _
_ [Gm] _ _ [Bbm] _ _ [D] _ _ [A] _
_ [D] _ _ [A] _ _ [D] _ _ [A] _
_ [D] _ _ [G] _ _ _ _ _
_ _ _ [F] _ _ _ _ [G] _
_ [Db] _ _ [G] _ _ [C] _ _ [D] _
_ [A] _ [C] I admire, [D] _ _ [A] _
_ [D] _ [A] I admire [D] any guy [G] who knows his stuff.
_ Sure [Cm] we blew a couple of benches, [Db]
with the [Eb] couch and hip adventures.
[Ab] But you win [Db] a few, you lose a [Bbm] few.
Like Bernie [E] says, you keep [G] on hanging tough.
_ [Cm] Thanks to you, [D] _ _ [Cm] _ _ [D] _ thanks to you, I consider it [G] well.
_ _ Sure I made [Cm] out like a man, [Bbm] just exactly like you planned it.
[Cm] But like Bernie, [Db] my accountant told me [Gm] yesterday, _ [C] I owe it [Db] all to you.
[E] Bernie tells [G] me what to [Eb] do.
Bernie lays [Bbm] it on the [D] line.
Bernie says we sue, we sue.
Bernie says [A] we sign, we [E] sign.
[F] _ On the dotted [A] line.
_ _ _ [N] _ _ _