The Cold Hard Facts of Life Chords by Porter Wagoner

[C] _ _ _ [G] _ _ [C] _ _
I got back in town a day before I'd planned to _
[G] I smiled and said, I'll sure [C] surprise my wife _
[F] I don't think I'll phone, [C] I'll just head on home
For I didn't [G] know the cold hard [C] facts of life
I passed a little wine store on the corner
I [G] pictured pink champagne [C] by candlelight _
[F] I stopped the car right then, [C] got out and hurried in
My mind not [G] on the cold [C] hard facts of life
[F] A stranger stood there laughing [C] by the counter _
[G] He said, I'll take two bottles [C] of your piss
[E] [F] Her husband's out of town and [C] there's a party _
He winked as if to say, you [G] know the rest
I [C] left the store two steps behind the stranger
From [G] there to my house his car [C] stayed inside
But [F] it wasn't till he turned [C] into my drive that I learned
I was witnessing [G] the cold [C] hard facts of life
[F] I drove around the block till [C] I was busy _
[G] Each time the noise came louder [C] from within
And [F] then I saw my wife [C] there beside me
And I drank a fifth of courage [G] and walked in _
[C] Lord, you should have seen their frantic faces
They [G] screamed and cried, please put [C] away that knife
I [F] guess I'll go to hell [C] or I'll rot here in this cell
But who taught whom [G] the cold [C] hard facts of life? _
_ Who taught [G] whom the cold hard [C] facts of life? _