The Cockatoo Song Chords by Kevin Bloody Wilson

_ _ _ _ _ _ I'm just a little old fat [E] shop owner in [A] the docklands down by [E] the sea
[A] And mostly I [E] sell used cockatoos that [F#] the sailors sell to [B] me
When [E] they've done all their money on women and rum
They [A] hock their cockatoos [E] with me [A] Make a damn good dollar [E] selling second-hand
cockies But there's one I couldn't give away for free
_ Cause this poor little bugger spent his life on a lugger
[A] With a scabby old [E] sailor at sea [A] Chained to his bunk, [E] covered in spunk
[F#] While the sailor flogged [B] his meat [E] Cocky'd flap his wings like he was jacking
off too [A] Like that sailor'd do [E] all day
[A] And when he got close [E] to the vinegar's stroke He'd mimic what the sailor'd say
_ He'd say, I bet you seen a cockatoo or three
[A] I bet you seen a [E] cockatoo, [A] felt them, smelt [E] them, kissed them on the petter
I bet you seen a cockatoo or three I bet you seen a cockatoo _
_ So it weren't the poor little cockatoo's fault [A] Cause the only women [E] he'd seen
[A] Were those he'd seen [E] in X-rated [F#] videos and porno [B] magazines
[E] But therein lies the problem Cause [A] when Sheila's come into [E] me shop
I [A] got to run like fuck [E] to hide him out the back Before he starts flapping and bobbing off
Cause he's gonna say, I bet you seen a cockatoo or three
[A] I bet you seen a [E] cockatoo, [A] felt them, smelt [E] them, kissed them on the petter
I bet you seen a cockatoo or three I bet you seen a cockatoo _
_ One weekend when the shop was busy [A] As usual I hid him [E] out the back
But [A] I'd forgotten to put him in with [E] the brooders And [F#] the fledglings that had only [B] just hatched
So [E] when I opened up the shop on Monday morning [A] And went out back to [E] feed them birds
[A] I stood amazed [E] as I opened his cage I couldn't believe the sounds I heard
Cause there was baby cockatoos, budgies, [A] parakeets All colours and [E] assorted sizes
[A] Not only had he taught [E] them all how to sing It [F#] formed a fucking [B] feathered choir
[E] With canaries, ducks and chooks joining in [A] There was turkeys and a couple [E] of geese
[A] With them out front [E] saying, can you cunts All together on the count of three
Two, three, start [G] flapping _
[G#] _ _ _ _ [F#] [E] I bet you seen a cockatoo or three [A] I bet you seen a [E] cockatoo
_ [A] Get them, [E] strut them, kissed them on the petter I bet you seen a cockatoo or three
I bet you seen a [Em] cockatoo
_ _ I bet you seen a [E] cockatoo or [A] three I bet you seen a [E] cockatoo
[A] Get them, [E] strut them, kissed them on the petter I bet you seen a cockatoo or three
I bet you seen a cockatoo _
_ _ _ _ [B] _ [E] _ _ _
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
[G] _ _ [N] _ _ _ _ _ _