Chords for If It Flies, Floats or Fucks...

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
_ _ _ _ _ I found him sitting in a fold-out chair _ [F] in the shade of a palm [C] near an old caravan, [F] ten-foot
tinny [C] beached up on the sand, [D] looked like paradise [G] to me. _
[C] Then he offered me a homemade brew, _ [F] like boiled bull ants [C] with the kick of a mule.
[F] Then the story started flowing [C] and the truth come through [G] about life and how he [C] sees it. _ _ _
_ He said, [F] I've had it all and I've lost it all and [D] I'll give you some advice [G] for free.
_ _ _ _ If it [C] flies, [F] floats [C] or _ _ [F] fucks, rent it by [C] the hour. _ _
[F] If you crack a fat [C] when you're standing looking at it, [D] back off and think [G] about it.
Do you want to [C] be paying [F] this off [C] the rest of your life or do [F] you just want a taste of it [C] now?
_ So [F] if it flies, floats [C] or _ _ [G] fucks, rent it by [C] the hour.
Son, _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
_ _ see that cruiser [F] out there on [C] the horizon, son?
[F] Well, I had one bigger [C] than that.
_ _ [F] There's a crew of four [C] and chef and all [D] with a helicopter on the [G] back.
_ _ [C] And women, [F] son, [C] oh, fucking hell, don't [F] blame me if you don't [C] believe me.
_ _ [F] I'd fuck them quicker than [C] it'd take two blokes to [G] pull them out from underneath [C] me. _ _ _ _ _ _
[F] Yeah, I've had it all and I've lost it all, [D] so this is how I [G] see it. _ _ _
_ _ If [C] it [F] flies, floats [C] or _ _ [F] fucks, rent it by [C] the hour.
_ _ [F] If you crack a fat [C] when you're standing looking at it, [D] just back off and think [G] about it.
Do you [C] want to be paying [F] this off for [C] the rest of your life or [F] do you just want a slice of [C] it now?
So [F] if it flies, floats [C] or _ fucks, [G] _ rent it by [C] the hour. _ _ _ _ _ _
_ _ _ _ _ _ _
Don't need [F] no mansion [C] on the hill no more.
I got me caravan _ _ [F] and who needs a plane?
[C] That's fucking insane.
[D] Don't plan on going [G] nowhere.
_ And [C] if I want to [F] get high, [C] I'll drink home brew and [F] go fishing in me 10 [C]-foot tub. _
[F] And women, I'm pretty [C] much over them now.
Just [G] took one of them to fuck it [C] all up. _ _
[A] _ _ See, [D] if you [G] don't maintain [D] an aeroplane, _ [G] it'll go down [D] on you.
And [G] if you don't maintain [D] a boat's the same, [E] it'll go down on [A] you too.
But [D] if you don't maintain that woman, _ _ [G] it'll work the other [D] way.
_ _ [G] She'll take what's left [D] and just fuck off [A] and never go down on you [D] again. _ _ _ _ _ _
[G] Yeah, I've had it all and [D] I've lost it all [E] and I wouldn't have it any [A] other way. _
_ So if [D] it [G] flies, floats [D] or _ fucks, [G] _ rent it by [D] the hour.
_ _ [G] If you crack a fat [D] when you're standing looking at it, [E] step back and think [A] about it.
You want to [D] be paying [G] this off [D] for the rest of your life [G] or you just want a slice [D] of it now?
So [G] if it flies, floats [D] or fucks, _ [A] _ rent it by [D] the hour.
_ _ _ So if it [G] flies, floats [D] or _ _ [G] fucks, rent it by [D] the hour. _ _
[G] If you crack a fat [D] when you're standing looking at [E] it, back off and think [A] about it.
You [D] want to be [G] paying this off [D] for the rest of your life [G] or you just want a slice [D] of it now?
So [G] if it flies, floats [D] or fucks, _
[A] _ rent it by [D] the hour. _ _
_ Yeah, if [G] it flies, floats [D] or _ _ [A] fucks, rent it by [D] the hour.
[G] _ _ [D] _ _ [G] _ _ [D] _ _ _ _ [A] _ _ [D] _ _
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