Chords for "Creation Science 101" by Roy Zimmerman

I'm [N] not a cynic.
_ I'm a hypocrite.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
_ _ Different.
Hypocrites believe in something. _
[Db] _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
[N] _ _ And it's great to be in a classroom, too, in a lecture hall, you know, because, you know, they want to teach creationism in the schools.
_ _ _ Creation science is what they call it, right?
That's the euphemism that they've chosen for [Ab] it.
And _ [N] I say teach that.
Teach creation science, but teach the Norse Odin myth.
_ _ _ Teach the karmic wheel and teach the Scientology version, [Gm] which says that the world was created on a bet between God and L.
Ron Hubbard.
_ _ [F] _ _ [G] _ And some of you skeptics might be, you know, you might have a kind of a [N] blind faith in science and _ empirical inquiry and _ observable reality and other [G] myths.
And [D] _ _ _ [E] so I thought I might set you straight on creation science [Gb] tonight.
_ [Ab] _ _
[Gb] _ _ _ [Ab] _ _ _ _
God made the world in seven _ [Fm] days. _
Well, that's one week to [Db] be specific. _ _
[Bbm] Now, that's what I call scientific.
[Bb] _ _ _
[Ab] Say, hallelujah.
Sing his praise.
[E] Four thousand forty two [Ab] B.C.
_ _ On Monday, August [Db] twenty seven.
_ _ He made the earth and sky in [Gm] heaven.
_ _ [Ab] Then he [Gb] punched out [Eb] at five oh three.
Then he made [Ab] Adam and then Eve. _
A garden for [Db] them to inhabit. _ _
The apple right where Eve could [Bb] grab it.
[Bb] _
And I got proof because I believe [D] creation science.
_ [Db] Well, in _ _ the beginning it [Ab] began.
_ _ [F] And you are just [Bb] beginning to educate [Gb] yourself when you [Eb] shun evolution.
_ [G] _ _ [Ab] _ _
[G] _ _ Then Cain and [Ab] Abel, he begat.
_ _ And they begat [Db] all of the rest to us.
Which means they must have [Bb] been incestuous. _
_ _ _ _ [Ebm] _ [C] I'm going to have to [Ab] pray about that.
There might be sinners in this class who might [Db] believe in Charles Darwin. _ _
I guess that's just [Bbm] their loss in [Bb] our win.
_ [Eb] _
Because I'm going to flunk their ass.
If you make Genesis [Ab] your text, _ _ you'll laugh at Darwin and [Db] what he _ sees to be the [Bbm] origin of species.
[Bb] _ _ [Db] Because he's just plain [Ab] over sexed creation _ science.
_ [Db] One oh one.
_ You ain't no monkey's [Ab] great grandson.
_ _ [F] You got to research [Bb] paper due about the fifty [Gb] reasons to [Eb] shun evolution. _
_ _ [Ab] _ _ _ _ _ _
_ _ _ _ [Db] _ _ _ _
_ [Ebm] _ _ [Bb] _ _ _ [Ab] _ _
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
_ _ [Eb] _ [Em] Don't let them [Ab] hand you that old _ _ jive.
About [Db] survival of the fittest.
_ That notion don't [Bbm] pass the bullshit [Bb] test.
_ _ _ _ _ [Eb] Because look at me, I'm still alive.
God made the world [Ab] just like it is.
_ _ He made the [Db] fossils just to tease us.
_ _ _ _ [Bb] Old bones to test [Gm] our faith in Jesus.
_ [Eb] Yeah, this will all be on the quiz, creation [A] _ science.
[G] _ [Db]
One oh one.
_ _ _ Now Armageddon [Ab] your homework done.
_ [C] _ Because when this [Bb] semester is through, it's straight A's for students who shun [Ab]
evolution.
_ _ [F] The kids get such [Bb] an education.
_ _ _ [Eb] When they shun the heretical [Db] theory of the development of life on earth over millions of years by means of spontaneous genetic mutation.
_ _ [Ab] _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
_ _ _ _ _ _ [N] _ _